Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a man wearing a rug on his head? Matt.
If you don’t like mowing your lawn, just get emo grass! It cuts itself!
What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.
How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts' counselling session?
The psychologist will thank you for coming.
Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, and carbon?
Cuz you’re looking a little big Au Ti S Ti C.
Why can’t Chinese people have a white baby?
Because two wongs don’t make a white.
Son: Dad, I think I got a girl pregnant.
Dad: Well, is she already part of the family?
Son: Yes, why?
Dad: Then there’s no need to be worried.
Why are Americans stupid? They shoot everyone that goes to school.
What do you call a baby Mexican? A paragraph because they aren’t a full essay.
What do priests and McDonald's have in common? They both shove their meat between 10-year-old buns.
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
So, you're into pronouns? Let me she/them titties.
What’s the difference between a Black dad and a Pizza?
One can feed a family.
What do you call a rich Chinese person? Cha-ching!
Ask Siri what rich North Koreans are there.
Siri: "I could not find anything for this question."
A man was in a courtroom. The judge said, "What should this man's punishment be?"
A random guy yelled, "Off with his head!"
The judge said, "He shall give head to every man in this room."
The guy yelled, "Wait, that's not what I said!"
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.
Paul Walker died Fast and Furious.
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
How do you know if there's a vegan in the room?
Wait 2 minutes and they'll tell you.
Your parents are so proud of you. They LOVE you! <3