Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?

American: Self defense.

Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?

There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

What do Bob Ross's painting and the orphanage have in common?

They're both filled with happy little accidents.

What is a reverse exorcism?

It’s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child’s body.

Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.

  • 6
  • This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."

    A fat man meets a skinny man.

    The fat man tells the skinny man: "When people look at you, they think the world's starving to death."

    And the skinny man responds: "When they look at you, they know why."

    The other day I started watching Game of Thrones.

    I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest, and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh, so you're still on the first episode then?"

  • 5
  • What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave? A microwave doesn't brown your meat.

    Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?