Worst Jokes Ever
How do emo kids complement each other?
They say, "I like ya cuts g."
What is the worst combination of illnesses?
Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
Hey guys. I just wanted to say, while I think some rape jokes can be funny, not one of these are. In fact, I find them pretty horrifying.
I was raped when I was fourteen (about six years ago), and I have made one rape joke in my entire life when, last year, I said "I don't fuck with rapists, I just get fucked by them." I thought it was funny. No one else did, and they were probably right in that.
My point is this: rape jokes CAN be funny when they are used by victims as a way of coping with trauma. They CANNOT be funny when they are made about raping someone else. Even if there is a difference between joking about raping someone and raping someone, it is absolutely disgusting to think such a horrific crime is funny, and I am sure at least some of the posters on this page have already crossed the line into committing rape.
Great material for social scientific research, though, gentlemen. Really well done.
Somebody asked me, "What's that on your arm?" I just said, "My cats got OCD."
Bully: "Hey little Timmy, you look like an ugly rat."
Timmy: "Well, at least I'm a good chef and I'm in a movie, unlike you."
Bully: Dies from embarrassment. 😱
I never knew the kid at school had autism. I always just thought he was walking into cobwebs.
Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"
Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"
What do you call women's rights: A blank sheet of paper.
We shouldn't joke about rape, because rape is no laughing matter...
Unless you're being raped by a clown.
How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
Are you a fire alarm because you're loud and annoying?
Why are so many Americans stupid? Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
Q: What's stronger than family?
A: Whatever tree Paul Walker hit.
Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.
I was going on a date when I decided to put on Penaldo’s PR7 cologne to smell good. As I put on the cologne, my skin started to turn invisible!
I then realized the cologne had made me turn into a ghost 👻. Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my date 😡!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I fucked a chimpanzee behind my local zoo.
Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.
Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.
I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.