Zoo jokes
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
What do you call a zoo with no dogs? A shit zoo! 馃槀馃槀馃槀馃槀馃槀
I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu (shit zoo).
A guy walks into a zoo, but it only has one dog.
It's a shitzu.
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal was a dog.
It was a shih tzu.
Joe Biden said he was going to a petting zoo.
Trump said schools are not petting zoos.
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
Why did the cheetah always cheetah against the lion?
Because she knew the lion was always lion.
My friend went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog in a crate.
He said it was a Shitzoo!
Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.
How do you open a banana? Answer with a mon-key.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I fucked a chimpanzee behind my local zoo.
Friends are like penguins.
If you stab a penguin, they die.
So, a mom and a dad are having sex. Their daughter comes down and says, "Mommy, Mommy, what are you doing?"
The mom goes, "Uh, we're making a cake. Let's go back to bed." So she tucks her daughter in and says, "We will go to the park tomorrow."
So the next day they go to the park, and two teens are going at it in some bushes, and the little girl goes, "Mommy, Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."
So they go home, and the mom tucked her into bed and says, "Tomorrow we will go to the zoo." And so the next day they go to the zoo, and two monkeys are going at it, and the girl goes, "Mommy, what are they doing?" And the mom goes, "They're making a cake. Let's go back home."
And so they go home, and the girl goes, "Mommy, did you and Daddy make a cake last night?" And the mom nervously says, "N-no, why?" And the little girl goes, "Because I licked the icing off the couch."
What is an astronaut's favorite color? Zoo.
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
What do they feed a gorilla in Paris?
Ape Suzettes.
Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.