Zoo jokes
Why would you leave a damn gorilla out in the middle of the parking lot after you let the zookeeper bring a chimpanzee home from the zoo because me and the gorilla had too much to drink?
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
Roses are red, violets are blue, when I saw you I thought of the zoo and monkeys too!
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Friend: You look like a baboon.
Me: Stop talking, you look like a gorilla, so I might call animal control on you and I'll be seeing you at the zoo!
Monkey monkey monkey monkey.
A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"
The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"
What did the zoo say to the snow ❄️? Get lost!
What do you call a zoo with no dogs? A shit zoo! 😂😂😂😂😂
What did the kangaroo say to the elephant? Hi up there!
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!
What is an astronaut's favorite color? Zoo.
One day a truck driver had a truck full of squirrels. A police officer said, "Sir, I'm going to need you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver did so and left. The next day the driver was back, but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. The officer said, "I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver said, "I did. Today I'm taking them to the beach."
There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.
Monky.
I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the New York Zoo.
Friend: I have the eye of the tiger.
Me: So what? I have the balls of a gorilla.
Parents: We can't come back to the zoo next week!
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!