Me and my friend roasting each other.
Friend: You look like a baboon.
Me: Stop talking, you look like a gorilla, so I might call animal control on you and I'll be seeing you at the zoo!
A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"
The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"
What did the zoo say to the snow ❄️? Get lost!
What do you call a zoo with no dogs? A shit zoo! 😂😂😂😂😂
What did the kangaroo say to the elephant? Hi up there!
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!
What is an astronaut's favorite color? Zoo.
One day a truck driver had a truck full of squirrels. A police officer said, "Sir, I'm going to need you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver did so and left. The next day the driver was back, but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. The officer said, "I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver said, "I did. Today I'm taking them to the beach."
There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.
Monky.
I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the New York Zoo.
Friend: I have the eye of the tiger.
Me: So what? I have the balls of a gorilla.
Parents: We can't come back to the zoo next week!
Why did the zookeeper lose his job? For choking the chicken and spanking the monkey!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
My grandfather has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.
My grandfather had the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
