Yours jokes
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops, I dropped my lollipop!
Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
The trip from your eyebrow to your hairline costs $6000.
Your mom is so fat, she looks like she ate the marshmallow from Ghostbusters.
Look, I'm innocent. I was just going on vacation in NY, but my co-pilot said: "Hit it with your best shot."
Beans, your mum is fat!
What’s cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.
When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".
I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!
I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.
(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)
(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)
(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)
You wonder and you wonder. Grandma said you better go to bed now. Tell your dad and grandpa, and your dad and your mom.
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
At weddings, old people poke me and say, "You're next!" So I do the same to them at funerals.
School is like a boner. It's long and hard unless you're Asian.
Your hairline is so wonky, "Wheels on the Bus" goes round and round on your hairline.
You're a big Z!
Latias is red.
Latios is blue.
You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?