Yours jokes
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in 'em!
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
I like...
Wendy's.
"Wendeez nuts in your mouth."
Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?
Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.
Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.
Roberto: Judd, your DNA looks like the infinite symbol.
Judd: Roberto, your DNA looks like a pasta noodle.
Speak to your dad before I put my hand up your ass!
When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!
Peter: Curses!
Jacob: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Peter: *Crying*
Jacob: Why are you crying?
Jacob: Whatever. *Leaves orphanage*
Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!
Kid with mother: Your mom!
Why are you so fat? I bet you take after your mom more.
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
Your hairline is so far back that you have four faces to wash every day.
When I saw your hairline, I thought I saw kid Jason Voorhees.
What did the pen say to the pencil?
The pen said, "You're pointy."
I hope you forget your password to something, only to send something to an email that you also forgot the password to.
I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭
If you're looking at this, then look behind you!
Hey, is anyone’s mom missing? Yeah, yours.