You jokes
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
Die you potato.
I baked you a pie.
Oh boy, which flavor?
Pie Pie Pie Pie.
Dad, I'm hungry.
Hi hungry, I'm dad.
Why did you name this way?
Why Why Why?
What do you call a fat, lazy person who smokes weed? A baked potato.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.
That one stupid kid in class :
What do you call it when a gay guy farts?
An abortion.
What is the difference between a pornstar and a mosquito?
No one stops sucking.
Say yes if you wanna fuck.
What do you call a fat man that has a stomach shaped like an egg?
Humpty Dumpty!
What do you call an injured Panera Bread?
Panera Bled.
What do you call a batter in a hot air balloon?
So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.
And I asked him what he is doing.
Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.
Me: Erm... Are you a simp?
Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.
KG: You have it?
Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?
KG: Sure!
KG then went to her room.
Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-
KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.
KG: Have fun playing with them!
Guy: WHAT THE FU-
What do you call an Irish lesbian?
A Gaelic.
When someone calls you gay, say:
"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"
How do you circumcise a redneck?
You kick his sister in the jaw.
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.
A Chinese guy said to his friend: "I saw you fucking your donkey yesterday."
His friend: "No, that's impossible, it's too hot inside."
Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.