You jokes

Q. How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?

A. Depends how thin you slice them.

How do you circumcise a hillbilly? ... Kick his sister in the jaw.

Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.

What do you call a dead parrot?

Polygon.

How do you make an octopus laugh?

You give it ten tickles.

What do you call a Mexican Baptism?

Bean Dip.

Have you heard of the... uh Pokemon called uh rhy... rhy... Rhydon deez nuts?

Don't let an extra chromosome get you down.

I was crying at school, telling my friends my grandpa died. And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"

How is spinach like anal sex?

If you were forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.

I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

What did the receptionist at the sperm bank say when you were leaving? "Thanks for coming!" 😉😉

Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.

How do you know when Helen Keller is home?

Answer: When you hear somebody falling down the stairs!

Did you know that you can die from laughing? Well, that’s why I laugh so much.

I was gonna walk up to an emo and say, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed Jill’s thigh and said, “You know you wanna.” Jill said yes and pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?

JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.

What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?

Ginger! You racist fuc-

What's the difference between hungry and horny?

Where you stick the cucumber.