You jokes
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.
Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.
An Ob-Gyn asks a lady to put her feet up on the stirrups.
Doctor: My God, you have the biggest vagina I’ve ever seen!
Woman: You don’t have to say that twice.
Doctor: I didn’t.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener.
Why can't you kill a hooker?
Because they're dead inside anyway.
What do a Rubik's Cube and a dick have in common?
The more you play with them, the harder they get.
What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?
You shout out, "B-52!"
What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
Did you know Kurt had dandruff?
Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment!
What do you call two natives in a ditch?
A sleepover.
What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?
Bisexual.
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
Alien vs. Predator.
Did you know Paul Walker was a method actor? He took his role very seriously as a human torch.
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?
Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.