Waiter: "Here you go, one medium-rare steak."
Me: "I like it well done."
Waiter: "Thanks, that means a lot!"
You Jokes
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your daddy is gay, So are you!
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
Ever seen twins?
If you said yes, was it before or after 2001?
Jesus lives on a long timeline, so he may seem slow to you.
You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."
How do you know the hooker killed herself?
She sniffed the line off the dresser you said not to touch.
What do you call someone who subscribes to Toast4128 on YouTube?
A very good person.
Are you French? Because I Eiffel for you.
What do you call it when Panera Bread gets painted red?
Panera Red.
What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
You also have to learn to say no. For example: "Would you like a piece of cake?" "No, I'd like two."
Windows could not connect to the Internet, would you like to search online for a solution to this problem?
Do you know Imagine Dragons? Imagine dragon these nuts across your face!
What did the kamikaze instructor say to the students?
"Okay guys, watch very carefully because I can only show you this demonstration once."
Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
Dude, Mississippi got a better K/D ratio than you.
Why do people make fun of you jokes in worst jokes ever? Because it is called "worst jokes ever."
Everything is now so expensive in Africa that witches don’t serve food in dreams again. Am I lying? Okay, when last did you eat in your dreams?
