You jokes
Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?
Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time... and walk past.
You can slap, punch, knock out an orphan, what will they do? They don't have parents!
What do you call Scooby Doo with a blunt in his mouth? Scooby Dooby.
What do you call a dipshit?
A Charlie.
When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!
Mom: “Guess where I’m taking you, son!”
Son: “To the playground?”
Mom: “No, to the morgue.”
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
I'm jealous of the people who never met you.
Your skin's so bright you could be used as a highlighter.
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
Knock knock!
Who is it?
Knock.
Knock who?
Knock you.
One day, a chemistry teacher asked his student, whose name is Raj, "What is the chemical formula of water?"
The Raj replied, "HIJKLMNO."
The teacher asked, "What is this rubbish?"
The Raj replied, "Yesterday, you taught the chemical formula of water is H2O."
You are.
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
1st person: What do you call a blind pianist?
2nd person: What?
1st person: A pianist.
Why could you not hear the dinosaur clap? Because it's dead.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a boogie in it!