Bully: how is your girlfriend? Me:I don't have one! BULLY: I KNOW! ME:HOW are you parents? *Walks out of orphanage*
A homeless kid walked up to another kid and said, "I have what you don't." He said, "(Parents)."
And the kid said, "Your right, I do have parents," and walked away.
what do you call a bird with no feet? a fly
My dog once went to Uranus. 🐶🤣🤣🤣
You know, because dogs sniff Uranus? 😂😂😂
I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣
You know why the Twin Towers were more remembered? A hexagon is more commendable than a pentagon.
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol? Special forces
You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."
What is a orphans least favorite show: “how I met your mother”
Girl, are you a public school? Because I want to shoot my kids inside you.
Your hairline is so far back you ain't got a fo'head, you got a five head!
Doctor: You should stop masturbating.
Me: Doc, I'm almost done.
Pickup lines in 2022 are like: "Are you Russia? Because your bombs are so big!"
Did you hear that nursing homes keep returning the new Paul Walkers?
They let the elderly move fast, but then burst into flames and burn the patients alive.
Say what you want about Paul Walker, but he was a smart guy.
You can tell by the quantity of brain matter on his dashboard.
Me to an orphan: If you had a penny for everyone who loved you, I don't think you'd have any.
The orphan: But why?
Me: Because if someone loved you, they wouldn't have thrown you out.
When the ugliest cat looked at you, then you search up the ugliest thing in the world, you show up.
A priest walked in and said to the kids,
"Hey kids, are you ready for your faptism?"
Have you heard of the new sequel to "The Exorcist"?
A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son.
Why can't you solve a murder in Alabama?
All the DNA is identical and there are no dental records.
