I wish I could follow you, though.
But you need an account so I could follow you, but you don't have one. :'(
You Jokes
I love you, Lovely Perv!
You know who else has dementia?
Comments for answer.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
What do you call a Gary Dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
Did you know the giraffe’s hooves are the size of dinner plates? Too bad they would have nothing to put on them!
When I die I want to have a piece of paper near me giving a clue on how I died, like, "I want everyone to miss me except for this bullet," or, "You didn't hang with me but guess what did?"
True fact: Five out of six people think Russian roulette is safe.
(Russian roulette is a game where you put 1 bullet in a pistol that has 6 chambers; each person spins it and tries not to land on the bullet to find out if you got the bullet or not. You point the gun at yourself and pull the trigger.)
You're so skinny that when you're driving, you have to put the seat forward to reach the pedals. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
What do you call an Asian man flying a plane?
A pilot, you racist fuck!
This boy in my high school choir class had a decently big forehead, so I leaned in and said, "You know, if you painted an H on your forehead, maybe Kobe would've landed."
You wanna know how to get rid of potential scam callers?
Next time you get a call from them, just answer the phone and say, "Pizza Hut abortion clinic, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce, how may I help you?"
Are you a toaster?
Because I wanna take a bath with you.
If you can't stand the heat, sit!
Why did your daddy not come back with the milk?
Because you have no dad because your dad never loved you.
What do you call a wheelchair person with a gun? Special ops.
The best way to tell someone that you don't like them is by texting them "370HSSV 0773H" and tell them to read it upside down.
BF: Babe, I have two questions.
GF: Ok, ask!
BF: Where have you been all my life?
GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?
BF: Can you please go back there?
GF: What do you think of our love?
BF: Count the stars in the sky.
GF: Aww... It's infinity!
BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.
What do girls and noodles have in common?
They both wiggle when you eat them.
