You jokes
You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.
What do you call a pencil with no end?..
Pointless.
Like if you blow male cows?
Like if you have balls.
Did you hear about the emo kid that tried to high-five a tree? It left him hanging.
Can you imagine what was the last thing that went through their brains?
The knee caps.
What do you call an Indian with pink hair?
Ghandi floss.
What do you call a group of children who go on strike?
A minor's strike.
Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.
Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Timmy: *starts crying*
Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.
Did you see that car crash today where the guy got the entire left side of his body cut off?
He's all right now.
My friend was feeling low today, so I went up to her and said, "You know, I would hang in there if I was you, swaying through life." I don't think she likes me now.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell it to clap until his/her parents are back.
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Raaj went up to his mom and said, "I bet you 10 dollars I can disappear." Then he turned off the lights.
Friend: What are you doing?
Me: Putting peanut butter on my balls.
Friend hears in the distance, "Orphans, I have food for you!"
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
What do you call a Sikh man standing on a rope? Balan Singh.
How do you kill a Hindu? PRESS THE RED BUTTON.
What do you call a white man farting? "British Gas."