You jokes
What do you call a Navajo with a lot of cash?
Johnny Cash.
Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.
How do you finger a feminist? Shake her hand and call her Theresa.
Two guys are on the playground. One guy says to the other, "Did you know that Hellen Keller had a playground in her backyard?" The other guy said, "No." The first guy says, "Neither did she."
I bet you go grocery shopping at the Twinkie Factory.
You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?
If I called you gay, you would probably hit me with your purse.
I bet you love prostate exams because you live things up your ass.
What do you call a Mexican Baptism?
Bean Dip.
What do you call a communist?
Braxton.
What's the only time you can do almost whatever you want?
When you have a gun in your hand.
What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic?
"Where do you keep the cans of paint?"
Mrs. Duncan knows where you live. She lives there too. In your basement... lolololololololololololololololololol
A blind guy and his seeing eye dog walk into a bar.
The blind guy starts swinging the dog around on the leash.
The bartender yells, "Sir, stop! What are you doing!?"
The blind guy says, "I'm just looking around."
What do you call a pen with no head?
DeCAPitated.
A man walks into a bar and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. When he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says, "If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone's drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try?" The man decided not to take the risk. He thought the steaks were too high.
I would tell you a construction pun, but I'm still working on it.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve.