World jokes
How do you cause an African parade?
You just carry a water bottle around and hold it up!
The 9/11 and the Spanish flu are kind of similar.
The Spanish flu was a very dangerous flu, and in 9/11, something very dangerous flew.
Brazil is a joke.
I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.
Who said, "That's a small step for man, a giant leap for mankind?"
Not Stephen Hawking.
Memes
There are millions of people in the world, yet you are here.
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
You're so fat, you don't need internet because you're already worldwide.
What world record did the people in 9/11 get?
The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.
Your mum is so ugly that aliens don’t come here.
Germany is the best!
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
Orphan: Where are my parents?
God: New York City.
Orphan: But they used to live in China.
Kris
Damn this shit!
Megan Thee Stallion: What!
Kris: My mother is a fucker!
The whole world:
OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"
And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"
My junk was in the book of world records until I got kicked out of the library.
What's the smallest stick in the world?
Your man's dick.
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.