Word jokes
What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?
"Goodnight, Mom!"
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
The "f" in orphan stands for family.... wait a minute!
Yulia
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office account, I'll make you pay. You have my word!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Suicide.
Suicide who?
Suicide you.
Jas.
What do you call a fat duck?
Donald Duck.
I remember Grandpa's last words, "Oh, shit! It's in drive!"
A mom cow's last words were to the mom cow's son. They were, "You are..." then died. The son thought that he was adopted, but then three years later, the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say, "You were adorable." Then she died once more. Then two years later, she rose from the dead for the last time to say to her son, "And that's why we adopted you."
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"
Why did the butt fart?
Because they don't know the words.
Gwen is a liar. She said she is a Christian and then is saying bad, bad, bad, bad words. Shame on you, Gwen, LIAR!
A hitman walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "I'm here to assassinate John Tucker." The bartender replies, "He’s in the restroom." The hitman goes inside the restroom and comes out after 1 hour.
The bartender asks him, "Did you kill him?" The hitman replies with a sad face, “I asked him any last wishes and the guy asked me to allow him to finish his shit as he is half way in passing his stools, so I gave him my word that I would wait and so I waited for an hour, and when I asked him what’s taking him so long, he says he will not be able to finish because he is just getting started.”
Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
Kollaps
Are guys scared of the word "Choppiness"?
Because it is literally saying "chop-penis."