Women jokes
Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.
Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.
Abortion is a difficult topic for me.
On one hand I support it because it kills children.
On the other hand, it gives women a choice.
Man, I love this joke: Women's rights.
I told a joke about miscarriage to a group of women, but none of them laughed.
I guess it was a bad delivery.
I like my women like I like my traction control: disabled.
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?
Pro marriage tip: Let your wife know you’re all about women’s rights, especially the right to remain silent, because all appliances should be silent.
Rape isn't a joke.
It's a type of way of making friends and to mate with other women.
It's a way of art, and works on anybody!
Like this if you agree.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls.
How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women.
Flippity floppity, women are property.
H: *walks into bedroom* Why are you packing your bags?
W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.
*Later that day*
W: *walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags* What are you doing?
H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."
The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.
The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.
The third lady says, "I never had a husband."
The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."
They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.
The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."
"How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
A man can form Jupiter girls came from Venus, and other genders came right from Uranus.
Why are history teachers always women? Because they like to bring up the past.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.