Women jokes
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
Abortion is a difficult topic for me.
On one hand I support it because it kills children.
On the other hand, it gives women a choice.
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
I told a joke about miscarriage to a group of women, but none of them laughed.
I guess it was a bad delivery.
I like my women like I like my traction control: disabled.
Men built civilisations. Men went to the moon. Men invented the modern comforts of today’s society.
Women did none of those. They are useless, only fit to be baby making machines.
Rape jokes are so incredibly offensive to stupid women like me who don’t understand what comedy is.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls.
Rape isn't a joke.
It's a type of way of making friends and to mate with other women.
It's a way of art, and works on anybody!
Like this if you agree.
Flippity floppity, women are property.
How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women.
H: *walks into bedroom* Why are you packing your bags?
W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.
*Later that day*
W: *walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags* What are you doing?
H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."
The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.
The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.
The third lady says, "I never had a husband."
The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."
They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.
The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."
"How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
A man can form Jupiter girls came from Venus, and other genders came right from Uranus.