Rape jokes are so incredibly offensive to stupid women like me who don’t understand what comedy is.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snow balls.
H: *walks into bedroom* Why are you packing your bags?
W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.
*Later that day*
W: *walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags* What are you doing?
H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.
Why aren't women taken seriously in the world? They are too busy whining about getting raped.
123 bipity bopity 321. Women are property.
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
What do women and Nvidia have in common?
They both do not make very good drivers.
Why are history teachers always women? Because they like to bring up the past.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
What did the drunk woman say to the man after leaving the bar?
"Alcohol, you later!"
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."
The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.
The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.
The third lady says, "I never had a husband."
The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."
They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.
The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."
"How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
Josh: What’s the useless piece of skin around the vagina called?
Daniel: Isn’t it the women?
Josh: Oh yes, that’s right.
What does a woman do when she leaves the battered women's shelter?
"Cook my dinner, if she knows what's good for her."
Ariana Grande agrees with me on something: women belong in the kitchen and bedroom.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
When a woman removes polish with chemicals, no one bats an eye.
But when Hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, everyone loses it...
I like my women how I like my cigarettes: Smokin’ hot, and with a little saliva on the butt.
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
