Women jokes
Women are like dogs...
"Where are you going? Where are you going? Where are you going?"
"Can I come? Can I come? Can I come?"
"I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here... I'll wait right here..."
SHOES
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
Little Jonny just came back from quarantine with his girlfriend, Sally.
They both said they had to go to the bathroom. When they came back, Sally was coughing up a storm. The teacher said, "You need to be quarantined again."
"No," Sally said, "I was just in the bathroom choking on something that grown-ups, especially women, like." Then the teacher faints.
What do tampons and your sister have in common?
Women are like towers, the man wants to bang them both.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
I went to the “lists of women” page on Wikipedia and it was blank.
Either, Wikipedia is proving women do not exist or John Cena decided to come out as transgender.
"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Money and women are kind of the same thing for me; it comes and goes very easily.
Women deserve rights and lefts.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
Why is it that skinny men like fat women?
Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.
What's the difference between women and men?
Men have rights.
What’s the difference between women and cars?
At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.