Why jokes
Why are washers better than babies?
Washers don't cry when you put a load in them.
Why do people think Jesus is going to come back? He wasn’t nailed to a fucking boomerang!
Why was the orphan single? Because it could not call someone "daddy".
Why does Michael Jackson have such a hard time playing chess?
He can't choose between black or white.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She had no arms. "Knock knock." Who's there? Not Sally.
Why is there only 363 days in an orphan calendar? Because they don't have Mother's Day or Father's Day.
Two chinamen walk into a bar. The landlord says, "Why the same face?"
Why are the Americans good at Rubik's cubes? Because they have a long history of separating colors.
Why do orphans love drinking water? Because they have no milk to drink!
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why can't two Chinese people have a white kid?
Two wongs don't make a white.
Why can't orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy".
Why doesn't a skeleton dance? Because he had no body to dance with. Lol, Sans.
Why can’t the blind man find love?
It’s called love at first sight.
Johnny was watching TV when he heard them say "bitch" and "bastard," so he asked his dad, "What is a bitch and bastard?"
Dad said, "A bitch is a female, and a bastard is a male."
Then Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "ass" and "shit," so he asks his dad what "shit" and "ass" means. Dad says, "A shit is shaving cream, like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat. Why don't you bug your mom?"
So Johnny goes back to the TV, and then they say "fuck," so Johnny asks his mom what "fuck" means. Mom says, "Fuck means carving, like doing to the turkey." Then a few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door, so he answers it. He then says, "Welcome, bitch and bastard, may I tack your ass?" The people then ask where his parents are. Johnny says, "My dad is putting shit on his face, and my mom is fucking the turkey."
A wife asked her husband why he cheated on her. His reply was, “She was just lying there naked on the table, what was I supposed to do?” The wife replies, “Change the damn diaper, you idiot.”
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
Q: Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
A: Because their dad is shopping for the milk.
Most people say I'm a clown. Yet they don't laugh at my jokes. Most people avoid me because I'm a "clown". Yet I'm not the center of the circus. But I know I'm gonna be a clown forever. Because I can't take this damn mask off, no matter how hard I try.
Weeks later: Finally I found out why I'm being called a clown...because my smiling face is fake...
Two cows are out grazing in the field. One cow says to the other cow, "Aren't you worried about this mad cow disease that's been going around?" The other cow replied, "Why would I be worried about mad cow disease? I'm a rabbit!"