Why jokes
Why did the chef cook his eggs on the golf course? Because he wanted them par-boiled!
Why can't you hear a dinosaur clap? They're dead.
I thought I told you to lock up when I left this morning. This is why our shit gets stolen all the time!
Why is the iPhone 7 not a smartphone?
It doesn't know jack.
Why did the kid go in the guy's van?
Answer: He thought he was being adopted.
Why did the koala cross the road?
To get to the big tree.
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.
And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
Next: Inappropriate Jokes
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?
Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.
Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?
Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.
Why are the Twin Towers actually twins?
Their birth and death date are the same.
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy/mommy."
Your mama so fat that’s why Hulk gets big.
Why can't orphans go to Costco?
Because it's a family shop.
Why can't orphans play paintball?
Because they don't have parent supervision.