Why jokes

Why is parking a car like finding a girlfriend?

All the good ones are taken, so you stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody notices.

Why did Yoda go to jail for rape?

He doesn't get consent; he just uses the force.

Sans: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?

Papyrus: Because they looked like me?

Sans: ... Sure.

Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?

A: There was a face off in the corner.

I'll never forget my brother's last words: "Why is there a revolver in your hand?"

Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

Teacher: 502.

Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

Teacher: No, you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!

Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.

Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?

Teacher: open door, put giraffe in, close door

Student: No! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.

Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one?

Teacher: let me guess the lion?

Student: No! The giraffe because He's in a fridge.

Teacher: WOW!

Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?

Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?

Student: The gators are at the party.

Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?

Teacher: She drowned?!

Student: No! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?

Donald Trump can only F@#k up.

Why does an orphan love to go to church?

Because they have someone to call father.

Why couldn't Helen Keller eat her Big Mac?

She was too busy trying to read the sesame seeds.

Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock?

Because it’s a little meteor.

What's worse than depression & suicide?

Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.

Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?

Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.

A drunk walks into a bar and says, "All lawyers are assholes!" A guy at the other end of the bar says, "I resent that!" The drunk says, "Why, are you a lawyer?" and the other guy says, "No, I'm an asshole!"

A boy went to a costume party with a girl on his back. Someone asked him what he was supposed to be. He answered, "A turtle."

"Then why do you have a girl on your back?" the guy asked again.

The boy answered, "It's Michelle."

Why are babies called bundles of joy?

When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.

Q: Why did frosty pull down his pants?

A: He heard the snowblower coming.

Why is the lesbian lifestyle so expensive? -- They're always eating out.

... and they buy Rolexes for their neighbors, because they wanna watch.

Why couldn't Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms.

Why couldn't Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her.

Why couldn't Sally pick up the box? (Friend: *Some weird guess*) Because she had no arms.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Because she got hit by a bus.

Knock Knock. (Friend: Who's there?) Not Sally.

Why can't an orphan play Family Feud? Because it has to have a family.

People always said that if you killed a murderer, there would be the same number of murderers. Why stop at one?