Why jokes

Why did Trump go to Jeffrey's secret Island?

So he could trump that little bitch!

Why can't you solve a murder in Alabama?

All the DNA is identical and there are no dental records.

Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?

She washed up on the beach.

Why did the squirrel do the backstroke?

He wanted to keep his nuts dry.

Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.

Why are orphans so good at tennis?

Because that’s the only love they get.

Why did Helen Keller burn her hands?

Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.

If Uranus is so gross, why do they take HD photos of it?

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The "p" is silent.

Jim's car is swerving all over the road, so a cop pulls him over. "Step out of the car," says the cop. "I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test." "I can't," Jim responds. "You see, I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack." "Alright," says the cop, "then you're going to have to take a blood test." "Can't do that either," Jim responds. "I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won't stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death." "Ok," the cop answers, "then I will need a urine sample." "Sorry," says Jim, "I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low." "Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me." "Can't do that either," responds Jim. "Why not?" demanded the exasperated cop. "Well, because I'm drunk!"

Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?

Because they had a connection.

Why can you never hear bunnies having sex? Because they have cotton balls.

Why did the skeleton not go to the dance?

Because he’s dead.

You idiot.

Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?

Tequila.

Why were the Twin Towers scared at dinner?

Because their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"

In chess, why does the queen have more mobility than the king?

Because the chessboard looks like a kitchen floor.

Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?

A: So she can moan with the other.

Why did the heterosexual man put a mask on his cock to protect himself from COVID? Silly boy.

Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?

Because everything they do is in vein.

Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".

Wanna know why not to joke about 9/11? They usually crash the party.