A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the Doctor's office. When he gets there, the Doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the Doc why? The Doc said, "So I can examine you!"
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender
Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?
She washed up on the beach.
Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?
Tequila
Why is it best to date suicidal women? Because if there's no pulse, there's no need for consent.
Why did the squirrel do the backstroke? He wanted to keep his nuts dry.
Why cant asian parents have a white child? Cuz 2 wongs dont make a white
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get
If Uranus is so gross, Why do they take HD photos of it?
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom. The "p" is silent.
Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?
Because they had a connection
Why can you never hear bunnies having sex? Because they have cotton balls.
Why does Mexico never hold the Olympics? Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is already out of the country.
why did the skeleton not go to the dance?
because he’s dead.
you idiot.
Why did Helen Keller burn her hands? Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.
In chess, why does the queen have more mobility than the king?
Because the chessboard looks like a kitchen floor
Why did the heterosexual man 👨 put a mask 😷 on his cock to protect himself from covid silly boy 👦 😜
wanna know why to not joke about 911? They usually crash the party
Why Was The Blonde Fired From The M&M Factory?
For Throwing Out the W's
Why was Wacko Jacko willing to write a song for the film Free Willy?
He thought that the film's title was a nice phrase to yell out in primary school playgrounds.
