Why jokes
Why can't Pooh Bear catch a date?
Because he is always talking about his honey.
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired."
Why couldn't Bob hang himself?
Because he had no arms to tie a knot. :'-)
Why does Beethoven's music sound like hell sometimes?
Because he doesn't listen to it!
Why do orphans never play baseball?
'Cause they can never get a home run.
Q: Why did the Queer get fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
Why did people bully Steven Hawking?
Because he couldn't stand up for himself.
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
Why are ant colonies very healthy? Because they have lots of antibodies.
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the knucklehead's house...
Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.
Two friends who've been bros for forever see each other in Wal-Mart in the card section. The first guy asks what he got his wife for her birthday. The second guy tells him he got her a Maserati and a card. The first guy tells him he got his wife a card and a dildo for her birthday.
The second guy asks why he got his wife a dildo for her birthday. The first guy says, "If she doesn't like the card I got her, then she can go fuck herself!"
Why is April the smartest month?
It can never be fooled.
Why didn't the skeleton follow his dreams? He was too gutless.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore?
He didn't have the heart to put into it.
Why did the bat fall out of the tree?
It couldn’t hang in there.
Why didn’t the girl like stairs?
They were always up to something.
Why don’t mountains catch colds?
They wear snow caps.
Why did Jack throw his alarm clock out the window?
Because it reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man who was accused of knife-raping his wife.