Why didn’t the girl like stairs?
They were always up to something.
Why Jokes
Why don’t mountains catch colds?
They wear snow caps.
Why did Jack throw his alarm clock out the window?
Because it reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man who was accused of knife-raping his wife.
Why are babies called bundles of joy?
When you break the bundle, it gives you joy.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream?
He was hit by an ice cream truck.
"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.
"Why?" said her friend.
"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"
"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.
"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
Why did little sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
What did sally get for Christmas?
Gloves! Only joking...she still hasn’t opened the box.
Why did the farmer go to the strip club?
Because he was looking for his hoe.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
Why didn't the sun go to college?
Because it already had a million degrees!
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt, quack!
Why is Megan a down?
Because her last name is Downy.
Q: Why don't pedophiles win races?
A: Because they like to come in a little behind.
So, a woman gets into a car accident and is in the hospital, and the doctor goes on to tell the man what is going on.
Doctor: "So, your wife, she is paralyzed from the neck down."
And as the doctor goes on, he says all the things the man must do for her, like feed her, dress her, etc. Then the man says, "Why, WHY ME!"
Then the doctor leans over and whispers in the man's ear and says, "I'm just fuckin' with you, she's DEAD!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
A horse, a fox, and a bunny join together and make a rock band. They started doing tiny gigs, but they got famous and went on tour. They all got so famous it went to their heads, and the band disbanded. The fox made his, and the bunny made her own. The horse was sad that the band was no more, so he went to a bar, and the bartender asked why the long face?
Why does it take longer for women to orgasm than men?
Who cares?
Why was six scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.
This is a joke about Ms. Ploopatoink, a made-up character who is a pink fluffy pony who loves toilet paper.
Why is Ms. Ploopatoink like a toilet plunger?
They both jump in the toilet!
