Why jokes
Why did the orphan play GTA? So he could get wanted.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't run home.
Little Johnny was watching TV when he heard the TV say "bitch" and "bastard." He went over to his dad and said, "What is a bitch and bastard?" His dad looked at him surprised and said, "A bitch is a female, a bastard is a mailman." Johnny went back to the TV and heard them say "ass" and "shit," so he goes back to his dad and asks, "What shit and ass mean?" His dad says, "A shit is shaving cream like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat, why don't you bug your mom?" Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "fuck," so Johnny goes over to his mom and says to her, "What does fuck mean, mom?" She looks over at him and says, "Fuck means carving, like what I'm doing to this turkey!" A few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door. He walks over and answers it. He then says, "Welcome bitch and bastard, may I take your ass?" The people, looking horrified, then ask where his parents are. Johnny responds with, "My dad is putting shit on his face and my mom is fucking the turkey!"
Why is a bee's hair so smooth and sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
Why is America bad at Clash Royale?
Because they can't defend their towers.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"
Because he would have beef with Homelander.
Someone was throwing Stephen King books at everyone. I had no idea why though...
Then IT hit me.
Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans look so ugly?
Because they have a face not even a mother could love.
Why can't dwarfs go to space? Because NASA is not sending monkeys into space anymore.
Why did the depressed person rob a bank? Because you're not killing yourself if a cop does it for you!
Q: Why is America bad at chess?
A: Because they already lost two towers.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
Why are Putin and Zelensky neighbors?
Apparently, a big dick needs a great set of balls next to it.
A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.
The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.
When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.
The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"
She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."
The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"
Why did the math book look so sad?
Because it has many problems.
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."