Whos jokes
My grandfather was the type of person who never threw anything away.
He died in World War II holding on to a hand grenade.
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.
Kids make a lot of plans for people who can't drive anywhere.
If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?
They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.
Memes
"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date.
"That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?"
"I'm a butcher," he says.
"Did you hear about the flasher who exposed himself to two elderly ladies in Central Park? One had a stroke. The other couldn’t quite reach."
"Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now."
How do you kill a retard?
Give them a knife and say, "Who's special?"
What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A.
A who?
A-bless you!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Iceberg lettuce. Iceberg lettuce who? Iceberg! Let us in!
I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.
BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
"Knock Knock..."
"Who's There?"
"Kenya"
"Kenya who?"
"KENYA OPEN THE DOOR IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE!!!!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Water.
Water who?
Water you waiting for, just let me in!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the knucklehead's house...
Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to cook?
Lil' Spice
What do you call a rapper who LOVES gardening?
MC Planter.
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
MC Presto.