When jokes
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
Why did the T-Rex not clap when you won a prize?
Because it's dead.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.
(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)
Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!
Yo mama is so fat that when she fell over, she created the Grand Canyon.
Memes
You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"
Yo mama so old, when she left the antique shop, the alarm went off.
Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.
Q: What's the difference between a suicide vest and a feminist?
A: At least one does something when it is triggered.
Yo mama is so fat, when she's walking down the street, there are cracks all over the sidewalk.
How did the cookie 🍪 feel when he was dunked in milk?
Batter.
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
When a clock goes forward, it goes "tic-tac," but when Rommel goes backwards, it's tactic.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
Ever heard of account stealing?
Ever heard of someone by the name of "#SHUT THE HELL UP GWEN DON'T EVEN DATE PRINCE ON FACE BOOK!!!!!!!! I HATE IT WHEN UR HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"?
Yo momma's so fat, when she gets an abortion, she can feed the entire country of Africa leftovers.
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
Q: Why are orphans so successful? A: Because when they were younger, they got told, "Go big or go home," and only had one option.