When jokes
Yo mama so stupid that when she went to see Fast and Furious 8, she was bringing her car to the theater.
What happens when two walls meet?
They are cornered.
What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?
"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"
When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.
What is it called when a cow sings? A lawsuit.
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
What's the difference between a pizza & a person?
A pizza doesn't scream when I try to shove it into an oven...
What is it called when Bill Cosby and an illegal immigrant fight?
Aliens vs. Predator
A pedophile is at a school parent night. He's holding hands with an eight-year-old girl when he's approached by another parent. She says to him, "Oh, what a darling little girl you have there." The pedophile replies, "No," then points his finger to a child across the room and says, "That's my child."
What season is it when you're on a trampoline?
Spring time!
What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap the mosquito, it stops sucking.
Yo mama so stupid that when the mirror cracked, she tried to order another one.
Check out my YouTube Channel! (Gamer Zacoo01).
What do you say to Stephen Hawking when he dies?
"Rust in pieces!"
What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?
- Kelp!
When I went to basketball training, there was a giant bag of basketballs on the floor.
My friend was like, "That’s a huge sack of balls."
He didn’t realize what was about to happen.
What do you call it when Portericans surround your house?
A spicket fence!
When you're fucking your boss's daughter, then you realize that you are self-employed.
I don't like it when people make 9/11 jokes. My dad was in it.
He was the best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.
My parents told me that when they had sex, it was absolutely shambles.
Thankfully, it turned out that they were real balls.