Whats jokes

What's the difference between a parachute and a coffin?

One brings you safely to the ground, and the other is a last resort when you've already hit it.

I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.

BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?

You know what's crazy? Is that the low taper fade, like, meme, is still MASSIVE. Still MASSIVE. Like, I'm still seeing like, new ones, that I've never seen before, and they're getting millions of likes and millions of views.

What's the difference between my dad and milk? There is no difference; they both left.

Everybody is talking about Trump having leaks in his office.

I don't see what the problem is. He should just use a better fitting diaper next time.

What did the wizard say when he was filling up the gas tank? "Expensive Petroleum!"

What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.

What's something you can say in church and while having sex?

I come in the name of the Lord.

What does a Jew expecting guests say?

"Oy, vey, are they here yet?"

What the fluff happened to this website?

What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?

Flexin’.

What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?

Hot wheels.

I've asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far, no one has given me a straight answer.

What is the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler?...

Michael Phelps can finish a race.

What’s the difference between Santa and my dad?

Santa got the milk.

What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?

They both have special needs.

What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?

They both only change their pads after every third period!

Q. What does Jeffrey Epstein get his sex partners for their birthday? A. Crayons.

What is the first thing you would do if you woke up as a woman?

"Probably the dishes."

What do you call a romance movie for Down syndrome people? Chromeo and Juliet.