Whats jokes
What's the difference between a golfer and a fisherman? A fisherman has to bring proof back.
What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?
We have a case of Witzelsucht.
Hey Gwen! What is a bean's specialty? Being a jerk!
What’s an orphan’s least favorite event? Their birthday!
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
Memes
THE HOOD
What do elephants drink on vacation?
Peanut coladas.
What competition do nuts participate in?
The peanut butter cup.
What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?
“I’m gonna cashew!”
What’s similar between a pregnant 12 year old and the fetus inside of her?
They’re both thinking, “Oh, shit, my mum’s gonna kill me!”
What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don’t care if she has one.
What do you call an angry nut with a mustache?
A pistachio.
What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
What do you call super expensive shoes?
Cashews.
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
What's the slowest train in the world? A slow coach!
What is a cannibal's favorite food?
Finger food.
This bitch won't message me anymore, what the fuck do I do? Why are bitches so sensitive?