Whats jokes
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Ho Lee Fuk.
What went up but never came down?
Stephen Hawking's IQ.
What's the difference between a female NCO and a zebra?
A zebra didn't have to suck and fuck to get its stripes.
Gay person to girl: What’s your favorite planet?
Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?
Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!😅
What do you get when you cross a clergyman and a politician?
A panhandler.
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope? Stopping it with a shovel.
What do you do if a woman is choking? Pull out a few inches.
What games do monks play a lot?
Among Us.
What do you call a group of emo kids? Suicide squad.
What does a Foreigner say when he comes to America?
"You're as cold as I.C.E. You're willing to sacrifice brown lives..."
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? "You look a bit flushed."
What do you call an autistic person who is a dumbass? A dumbism.
A boy asks his father:
"What is politics?"
Father answers:
"It’s very simple! You see, I bring in the money, so I’m big business. Your mother spends the money, so she’s the government.
Your grandfather sees to it that everything is managed in an orderly way. So he’s the law.
Our maid is the working class.
Everything revolves around your interests, so you’re the people. Your little baby brother represents the future."
The boy has to think it over. That night he hears his little brother crying due to a dirty diaper. He doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the bedroom of his parents. There his mother is sound asleep. He goes to the bedroom of the maid, but his father is there fucking the maid — and oddly enough his grandfather is watching through the window.
Nobody notices the boy and he returns to his bed.
The next day his father asks him:
"So, can you now explain to me what politics is?"
The boy says:
"Yes, it’s all become clear to me!
Big business screws over the working class while the law watches and the government sleeps. The people are ignored and the future lies in shit."
Obama: It smells like UpNigga in here...
Trump: What's UpNigga?
Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!
What do you call a walkie-talkie for retards? -- A stumblie-mumblie.
What kind of book does cheese read at a church?
The Hole-y Bible.
What do you call a fat girl with a rape alarm?
Optimistic.
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.