Whats jokes

What does a bullied kid say during a game of Kahoot?

"I'd like to Kahoot up this school."

What's the difference between me and cancer?

My dad didn't beat cancer.

What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.

What's similar between a fetus and a failed mission?

You abort it.

What is the difference between the Titanic and the Twin Towers?

They both went down.

What do orphans need in order to mail letters?

Food stamps.

What looks like peanut butter and jelly, and makes a woman scream?

Afterbirth.

What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?

A gay guy that’s straight!

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing, it just waved.

What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?

One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!

What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?

The Las Vegas shooting.

When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"

I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."

What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?

Soaked...

What did the sun say to the Earth?

"Am I hot?"

What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.

What does a Jamaican guy say to an Asian?

Poke me, mon.

What’s the best part of violently raping a sexy 10-year-old girl? Killing the little bitch afterwards.

It was 7:00 a.m. when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep. He got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat. "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely. Billy replied with, "Whatever Dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"

What do you call a hospital that's flooded with vegetable soup?

What's the difference between having sex with my girlfriend and a baby?

I don't have a girlfriend.