Whatโs the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?
I beat both of them.
Whats Jokes
GF: What do you think of our love?
BF: Count the stars in the sky.
GF: Aww... It's infinity!
BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.
What is the difference between an apple spread and an orphan spread?
Apples get picked.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Dad jokes.
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Whatโs the difference between Geico and a wife?
Geico saves you more.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked, and the other doesn't.
What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?
Yung Flung Dung.
Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.
What is a pedophileโs favorite part about Halloween?
Free delivery.
What do you call a group of transgender women?
X-Men.
Girls: OMG what color should I use, baby blue, light blue, or navy blue?
Boys: blue is blue.
What's the worst thing you can say to a widow?
"I'm sorry, I just had to."
What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.
What's pink and rusty? Madeline McCann's bike.
Imagine you are getting eaten by an alligator. What do you do?
Stop imagining!
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.
Me: Cool, what rank of officer?
Jim: SS.
Me:...
What are cheetahs' favorite chips?
Cheetah Puffs!
What do you call a person with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
What is an Irish kiss?
Fellatio from a gay Irishman.
