Whats jokes
What do you call a stalker stalking himself? A narcissist.
What do you call a dinosaur that loves sucking dino dick?
Sucks-alota-cocka-sorass.
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
What is Satan's way to go to places? A helicopter.
What did the rapper name his new DOG?
Lil Bark.
What did one tree say to the tree that was a bully? "LEAF me alone."
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
Top tip; if your wife asks, "What would you like to do to my body?" 'Identify it' is the wrong answer.
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say, "I'm a real boy."
What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?
The elevator can raise a family.
What’s the difference between the milk and drugs?
My dad brought the drugs back, not the milk though! 😭
What does a girl want more than anything in the world?
Nothing. She's fine.
What's big and white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms.
What did Sarah get for Christmas? I dunno, she hasn't opened it yet.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?
None. Neither can see their parents.
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
What’s the only plus for someone who burns to death?
They get a discount at the crematorium.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
"Goodness, that's what Post Malone sounds like?"
"Give me some pre-Malone hip hop any day!"