Whats jokes
What starts with M and ends with arriage?
Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?
Neither does the child.
What's the difference between your girlfriend and sister? Nothing if you're from Alabama.
Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?
A. Calculus homework.
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
What is an orphan's family portrait called?
A self-portrait.
😉 i like target now
What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.
what is it called when an illegal immigrant is getting raped?
alien vs predator
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
What mental illness do terrorists suffer from?
Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED).
What song do orphans hate the most? "We are family."
What do you call a group of Emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
What jumps and never let's go?
An Emo kid.
I bet all Emos want to be like their biggest influencers some day.
Dead.
Why do Emos want to be the "Scene" these days?
The only thing I've "Scene" from them is their suicide rate climbing, it's starting to climb quicker than they did to get to the top of whatever they jumped off.
What's the difference between Kelly Clarkson and a Florida real estate agent?
A Florida real estate agent screws over seniors, Kelly Clarkson screws little children.
What is the difference between a feminist and a vegetarian? A vegetarian doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons. However, a feminist doesn't act like a bitch for moral, religious, or health reasons.
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The fridge don't fart when you take your meat out.
What are you good at?
Dying. Dammit, I fail at that too.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin mobile.
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?
A receding hare line.
Teacher: Ok class, I'm going to ask a question about your family.
Alex: Miss, my Dad died in 9/11.
Teacher: OH NO, I'M SO SORRY!
Alex: Don't worry miss. It was only Dad and besides, he did what he wanted before he died.
Teacher: What was that?
Alex: Flew the plane.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.