Whats jokes
What is the difference between a tree and a dog?
A dog can walk and a tree cannot walk.
What is the difference between a human and a human?
Mom: I saw John Cena at WWE.
Son: No way, you can’t see him though.
Mom: God!
Son: What?
Mom: You watch too much reality TV (comes to smack butt).
Son: Also because I’m John Cena.
Mom: Where, where’d ya go?
John Cena: Hey, Mom.
Mom: I’m only 31, you’re 42.
What has 2 legs and walks? A human.
What time is it when you get home and you can walk, walk? Eeeeeew!
What time is it when you get home, and you can walk, walk home and walk, walk home from?
What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat a wank.
What do you say when you see an apple dancing in a talent show?
He's got some "sweet" moves!
What did the grape say to the banana? "Stop graping me!"
What do you call a baby in an elevator?
Lubrication.
What does the cell ride to work?
A vesicle.
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.
Two lawyers are sitting on a park bench, and these two beautiful women walk by. The first lawyer says to the other, “Let’s go fuck these chicks.”
The second lawyer says, “Outta what?”
What does e equal?
I don’t know, a bunch of random numbers, but e=mc2.
What happens when a Tandemaus evolves?
Friend: What's that white stuff coming out of the Pokémon Box?
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter; it ain’t coming to you.
What's the only gun that doesn't exist in Africa? The water gun.
So the Devil decided to go to McDonald's and grab some lunch. What does he get?
A hot and spicy McChicken and three six-piece nuggets.
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
What is the difference between a priest and McDonald's? Nothing, they both stick their meat in between 12-year-old buns.