Whats

Whats jokes

Pedophile

Why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always in the back (if you know what I mean)?

Mussel

What happened to the woman who slipped in a seafood restaurant?

Um...I don't know what?

She slipped on a mussel!

Guy

Say what you want about Paul Walker, but he was a smart guy.

You can tell by the quantity of brain matter on his dashboard.

Message

What was George's last message to humanity before joining the others?

"I CAN'T BREATHE!"

Orphan

What do orphans call a holiday?

A bit of soil and some leaves as a blanket.

Hooker

Q: What did one dead hooker say to the other dead hooker?

A: Nothing, dead hookers don't talk.

Shotgun

Roses are dead, violets smell like poo, I got a big fucking shotgun, what you gonna do?

Word

I asked my friend Cammy what is 55+68 and he was to say it in words, he replied with "swebin".

Poop

Oh, Mom, there is poop in the toilet still.

Mom: Oh, that was me and the dog.

Me: Wait, what????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Wap

I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.

Cat

What did a cat say to the dog?

"I will kill and eat you hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehheehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehheeehehehehehehehe"