Whats jokes
What is the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has dates.
What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?
Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.
What did the grape say when it was stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
What do you call Moby Dick's dad?
Papa Boner.
What did the parent say to M.J.?
"Get off my kid!"
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho... Alaska!
A weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel.
What do you call a fat motivational speaker?
Four chin teller.
What hurts the most? 😹
A. Breaking up before chewing.
B. Breaking up after chewing.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
Correctly spelled.
What do you call a pregnant slave?
Buy 1 get 1 free.
Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
What is your favorite amendment? A rapper.
Hey, let’s go, we are heading for the Towers!
Wait, what?
Call 911!
What's full of lard and is reserved as Putin's cannon fodder?
Your mum!!!
What do you call a red potato?
A tomato. 🍅
(I know it's cringe!)
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without kids.