Whats jokes
What do you call a white kid who kills another?
Russia vs Ukraine hahaha.
What do you call a triggered white kid?
A school shooter!
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
What did the cupcake tell its frosting?
I’d be muffin without you.
What can you say about planes that you can say about stocks?
They both be flying??
What can you say about that homeless man's life and current status?
Wasted.
What do you give a sick lemon?
A lemon-aid.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An im-pasta.
What do you call the sky? Up high, high! AHAHAHAHAHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAA
What do you call a flat cabbage?
A leaf pile.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Ground beef.
What did the turtle tell the man? To keep being 5G7T4IPK24O[\]TWERGWREWGRGR.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
What is yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of kids.
Blitz: "HOLD ON! You better move that pussy wagon right now, or I’m gonna..."
Vortex: "You'll do what?"
Blitz: "Or I'll... uh... uh, I- I'll call HR!"
*Silence, then Verosika/me, Blitz, and Vortex bust into laughter. And then back to seriousness*
Verosika/me: "Anyway, meet my new Hellhound... Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." *leaves and flips Blitz off* "Ta-ta fuck stain."
What the fuck is wrong with people?
What do black men in the NBA like about going to the locker room after they are done playing basketball?
Receiving golden showers from other black teammates.
Me: I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g.”
Emo kid: He said like your bullet holes, G.
Me: I have no bullet holes.
Emo kid: Not yet, you don't.
Me: Ayo what the fuc*.
What do emo kids and apples have in common?
They both hang off trees.