Whats Jokes

What did the woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach?

"Excuse me, sir, you're in my son."

What's long and not very hairy?

The conga line at the cancer department.

What do you call an Asian in a wheelchair? Sum Ting Wong.

What’s long and black?

The line at KFC.

What do you get when you mix a 737 and 767?

A 797.

What did Al-Shehhi say to Mohamed Atta?

"We are on time!"

Obama: It smells like UpNigga in here...

Trump: What's UpNigga?

Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!

What is Batman like?

He is an orphan.

What is the difference between me and cancer?

My mom did beat cancer.

What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?

I care when my computer crashes.

What do you call a different spaghetti? An impasta!

PAPYRUS: WHAT DO YOU CALL A DIFFERENT SPAGHETTI SANS?

SANS: What?

PAPYRUS: AN IMPASTA!

SANS: Good one.

Orphan: What are you doing tonight?

Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.

What did the South Tower ask the North Tower?

What's the difference between orphans and apples?

Apples get picked.

What do snowmen call snowballs?

Children!

What's up guys! Quandale Dingle here (RUUEHEHEHEHEHEEHE). I have been arrested for multiple crimes (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH) including: Battery on a police officer (WHAT), Grand theft, Declaring war on Italy, and public indecency (RUHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE x2 speed).

I will be escaping prison on, MARCH 28TH! After that I will take over the worl[d].

Your life literally is as valuable as a summer ant. I'm just gonna stomp you, you're gonna keep coming back, I'm gonna seal up all my cracks, you're gonna keep coming back, why? Cause you keep smelling the syrup, you worthless bitchass nlgga! You're gonna stay on my dick until you die. You serve no purpose in life, your purpose in life is to be on my stream sucking on my dick daily. Your purpose in life is to be in that chat blowing a dick daily. Your life is nothing, you serve ZERO purpose. You should kill yourself, NOW! And give somebody else a piece of that oxygen and ozone layer that's covered up so we can breathe inside this blue trapped bubble. Cause what are you here for? To worship me? Kill yourself! I mean that with a hundred percent with a thousand percent.

What goes up and down and needs two people?

A seesaw.

What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?

Yung Flung Dung.

So, little Johnny is walking down the street and asks a stranger, "Sir, what are hormones?"

Then the man replies, "The moans of a fucking whore!"