Whats jokes
What is the speed limit for sex? 68, because if you go any faster, you’ll have to turn around.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What do you call a blonde girl standing on her hands?
A brunette with bad breath.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's a saying you shouldn't tell an epileptic?
Seize your moment.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening?
A kitchen chair! Your momma sits in it for lunch, and your dad only manages to reattach one of the two legs that broke off by evening.
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.
What do you get when you mix Viagra with spinach?
Strong to the finish.
What is the favorite city of the pedophile icon? Paris.
What vegetable is good for your memory? A carrot, because the last time I had one shoved up my ass, I never forgot about it.
What is a Mexican's least favorite type of water?
I.C.E. water.
What's the difference between Canada and the USA?
In the USA, Trump is sitting in the Oval Office.
In Canada, he'd be sitting in the waiting room of a MAiD clinic.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? Hot Wheels.
What's red and spins really fast?
Kurt Cobain's ceiling fan.
What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? A rabbi cuts it off, a priest sucks it off.
Q. What's the Premier of Alberta's favorite sex toy? A. I don't know, but I wish it were me.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.