Whats Jokes

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?

Nothing, it just let out a little wine!

What do ambulances and gay men have in common? They both take it in the back and go whoop whoop! :D

Chuck Norris is...

What? You don't need to know what he is. He's just, Chuck.

What do u call a girl that runs faster than her brothers?

A redneck virgin!

What do you call a gay drive by?

A fruit roll up.

There were these three men; their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, they were riding in their car, and Shit fell out, so Manners went out to pick Shit up, and Shut up went to the police station.

When he got there, the police officer said, "What's your name, son?" and Shut up said, "Shut up." The officer replies with, "Ummm...excuse me?!" and Shut up said, "Shut up!" and the officer said, "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said, "Round the corner picking up Shit!"

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?

Robin, get in the car.

What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?

Kum and Go.

What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?

Unnecessary.

Me: Hey, what book are you reading?

Him: "The Twisted Ones."

Me: Uh, I guess that book is pretty twisted.

What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke?

Yours.

What does Stephen Hawking eat for breakfast? His shoulder.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?

Lean beef.

I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?

UGLY!

What do you call a person whose heart stopped?

Dead.

What does a skeleton tile his roof with?

Shin-gles!

What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?

I’m bone to be wild!

What do you call a skeleton snake?

A rattler!

What do skeletons say before they begin dining?

Bone-appetit!

What? A telephone? Nah, I'm using a telebone.