Whats jokes
Two lawyers are sitting on a park bench, and these two beautiful women walk by. The first lawyer says to the other, “Let’s go fuck these chicks.”
The second lawyer says, “Outta what?”
What do you get when you have an annoying kid, a homicidal kid, and a suicidal kid in the same room? A happy ending.
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
What fruit always feels depressed?
A blueberry.
What had more brains than Hitler? The wall behind him.
Hookers are like drive-thrus; you tell them what you want, pay for your stuff, and leave.
What do you call someone that is Mexican that has a BMW?
A big Mexican woman.
What's got 6 legs, 3 arms, and 3 heads?
The finish line at the Boston marathon.
What do you call a dead pine tree? A Nevergreen!
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
A person asks a taxidermist what they do for a living. The taxidermist replies, "Oh, you know, stuff."
What do you call a three humped camel?
A prostitute from New York.
What's the difference between an ISIS militant base and a Pakistani children's school?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
What's a perfect example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
What's the similarity between Catholic Priests and McDonalds? They both like sticking their meat in 6-year-old buns.
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
What’s the best part about twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them.
What's the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest.
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
A friend texts to another:
"Hey." They reply, "What's up?"
The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "The sky!" But the other friend intervenes and says, "No, it's the ceiling!"
To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "Unless you're homeless or six feet under."