What’s the hardest part about f...ing toddlers?
My boner.
Whats Jokes
What's red, white, and blue and crawls up your leg?
A homesick abortion.
Q: What's the difference between me and cancer?
A: My dad didn't beat cancer...
What do you call a pool full of retards?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?
Abo-lanche.
What movie do atheists watch for Christmas?
"Coincidence on 34th Street."
What is Batman's favorite food?
Justice.
What goes in soft and comes out hard?
Gum, you whore!
Two old Indian ladies out picking potatoes, one lady stops, staring at this huge potato, turning it round and round.
The other old lady says to her, "What are you doing?" She says, "These potatoes remind me of my husband's nuts."
She says, "Oh my, are they really that big?" She said, "No, they're that dirty. lololol"
What is black and white and red all over?
JFK
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I'm still here.
What is a terrorist's DJ name?
Osama Spin Laden.
Dropping beats like the Twin Towers.
Sally has no arms. What did she get for Christmas? I don't know, she hasn't opened it yet.
Please, can someone comment on this post to explain what satisfaction you get from joking about such serious issues?
What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much?
Nose-less.
What did one statue say to another statue? "Hey! Is that you?"
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.