Whats jokes
A man is with his friend in a bar.
The friend, out of the blue, asks, "Hey, what's your body count?"
Nervous, the man looks away.
The friend then says, "I'm talking about sex."
The man then turns back and mumbles, "Oh... I thought you saw inside the basement..."
"Wait, wha..."
"What?"
What do you call a lesbian? Me.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
The Windows XP log out sound.
What do you call a fat fortune teller? A four-chin teller.
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap a mosquito, it stops sucking you.
What is the best thing about being buried alive or burning to death?
No funeral costs.
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
What do you do when your dishwasher breaks down?
You punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
What’s the difference between a penis and a golf ball?
A penis always goes in the hole.
Stormtrooper: What should we do with this coffee?
Palpatine: Brew it!
What do you call a homeless bounty hunter?
Hobo Fett!
Stormtrooper: What should I do about my overdue library book?
Palpatine: Renew it!
Stormtrooper: What should we do about the failed plan?
Palpatine: Screw it.
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.
Stormtrooper: What happened to the Jedi Order?
Palpatine: Slew it!
Imperial Pilot: What do you think about the new Tie fighter?
Palpatine: Flew it.
Stormtrooper: What happened with your garden?
Palpatine: Grew it.
Stormtrooper: What should I do with this guide for my test?
Palpatine: Review it.
Stormtrooper: My lord, what should we do with all this beef?
Palpatine: Stew it.