Whats jokes
What do you call an anorexic person with a yeast infection?
A quarter-pounder with cheese.
I recently got kicked out of a casino because I apparently misunderstood what the craps table was for.
Tech administrator of a school: Hm, a message from Google security?
Tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT!
Assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME?
Tech administrator of a school: WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE!
Assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
Head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, almost as good as the one with Jack, Jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right?
Head of school board: *whispers* yeah we're fucked...
TWO HOURS LATER
Important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!
AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER
What do you call a black person swimming?
Cursed Minecraft image.
What’s the cow's favorite place to go? The moovies!
what's black and red and is a liquid?
my scars!
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
A white dad, a priest, and a rabbi all run out a burning school, and the dad says, “What about the kids?” and the rabbi replies to him saying, “Fuck the kids,” and the priest says, “Think we got enough time?”
A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."
A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."
<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*
Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."
What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.
What do you call fake noodles?
Impasta!
What do you call a Mexican that has lost his car?
Carlos!
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
What do you call a short person that goes to school?
A Sammie.
What do bees do when they get married?
They go on a honeymoon.
What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!
What do you call a stick with a string on the end of it?
A fishing pole.
What has 4 legs, then 3 legs, then 2 legs, then 1 leg, then no legs?
A baby you cut one off each time.
What do you call an arrow pointing the wrong way?
A Disap point ment.
What do you call Mary Berry when she’s on holiday?
A Cake By The Ocean.