What do you call jokes
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
What do you call a group of emo people?
"The Suicide Squad."
What do you call numbers that don’t stay in place?
Roamin’ Numerals.
What do you call a kid with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Q: What do you call a boomerang that is not coming back? A: A stick.
What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.
What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.
What do you call a short student?
A Ravin.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
What do you call a selfie of an orphan?
A family photo.
What do you call a group of emos?
Limited Edition.
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench?
The NBA.
What do you call a cutta with ginger hair?
Flinn Taylor.
What do you call a person who doesn't masturbate?
A liar.
what do you call a cow that fell?
Ground beef.
What do you call a banana eating a banana?
Canabananalism.
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
What do you call it when Hitler abuses his wife?
Adolf Hit Her.
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
What do you call an Irish lesbian? A gay lick.