Week

Week Jokes

Attention To Everyone- I will be leaving for 3 weeks for a Summers Break. I will be back in 3 weeks, When I come back I want someone to tell me everything that has happend over these weeks. (Gwen or Addison Banks). Sincerely, watersharky.

A asian gets a choice between his rice cooker or his son he instantly picks the cooker and says "HE GOT A B+ IN MATHS LAST WEEK HES A FAILURE"

alr ALYA and drew ALYA's boyfriend!! have a good fucking life, i hardly even think drew is real but uk whatever ive passed on but DREW if u fucking wanna beaf ill fight u bro, ur prob a stick, im fucking doing push ups 4 times a week 100 each.

The first time you have a new phone you have a different one you can change your phone to a new phone but it doesn’t change the phone 📱 it’s just different I think it will work I just think it would look good 👍 and then it would work but you don’t know if it’s the right thing for the new one you just know it’s the wrong 😑 it’s a bad phone 📱 it’s a new thing it’s the same for different every day but it doesn’t look 👀 and I think 🤔 so it’s not a good 👍 but it works so it’s different so it’s different for the new phone 📱 and it doesn’t have to work on it doesn’t matter to the same for you know it’s just the one ☝️ but it doesn’t have the one that I can do a lot better and I can just use my new one ☝️ but it is not that the new iPhone 📱 so you have the one that’s the other is that I have the same thing and it’s the same phone 📱 but I have to get the new iPhone 📱 I just want it and then you have a good 😊 and it’s a different number so it’s just like 👍 so it’s just one ☝️ but you know it’s not like 👍 I have the new iPhone 📲 so you know it’s just one ☝️ so it’s a little more than just the one ☝️ and it will get the new phone 📞 so it’s just easier and cheaper for the money 💴 but it won’t cost 💲 much more to pay 💰 off your car 🚘 than to get the phone 📱 for the next two weeks weeks or even two years to to have the car car 🚘🚘 fixed so it’s easier and quicker and I will be happy 😆 I’m happy happy 😊 I’m so excited excited 😊 thank y all and I will talk soon 🔜 and have you have an update as to the results soon 🔜 thank ya again so far hope all goes all are good 😌 hope to be in your class today love ❤️ and have you been in your dreams hope all your day too bye ✌️

My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week. He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.

An elderly was happy to finally see his wife again and was packing. He told everyone about the trip. "I will see her in one week" A week later he died

son:mom can i get 100$ for a week mom:why did u need 100$ for a week son:am going on a date and i need 100$ for a week pls mom:no no no no no no no no no no no no no go on ur date now u got 1$ so go son and u got 0.00.00$ mom

A guy goes in to get some tests done, the doctor comes out and says "I got good news and bad news." The guy says "Ok, let's get the bad news out of the way." The doctor says "The tests cam back positive, you got 2 weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh My God!! Then what the hell is the good news?" Doctor says "You see that nurse over there, the one with the big tits? I'm screwin her."

Little Johnny was finishing up his homework when the teacher gave him an assignment for the day. The instructions were simple: compare two objects, we will work on contrast next week

Daughter: So, I got my period. Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying! Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying? Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to the another day. Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically) Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless. Obviously.)

There were two two twin brothers Lucas and Marcus. Marcus got a girl friend while Lucas stayed single. A few weeks later Lucas was caught kissing Marcus's girlfriend and Marcus comes over and says: "Babe I know we're twins but I'm Marcus and that's Lucas you were kissing." and his girlfriend looks at him and says: "I know."

So, me and my girlfriend that I just got 7 weeks ago, we’re in class, we had this sub named Mrs. Bellatrix. We both raised our hands and she called on both of us. Me: First of all, are we in kindergarten? We can’t be doing 4x4 kinda stuff. Leah: and also are you from Harry Potter?