Weapon jokes
*Shotguns in a nutshell*
2B: MUST.
4B: ADD.
6B: MORE.
12B: *B A R R E L S*
*And that's how multi-barrel shotguns were made.*
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair? A TANK!
What does a Trump supporter use to load his/her AR-15?
A MAGAzine.
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?
"Sticks and stones break my bones."
A crowbar does it so much quicker.
What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?
Special forces.
What is a gun that Africa doesn't have? A water gun.
What do you call German weed?
Mustard Gas.
AR-15: Who are you?
Musket: I'm you, but from another timeline.
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
What did the Deagle say to the G17?
"Son, you're rushing, but in some way, I like it."
What did the bomber say to the jet?
"Sorry bro, I gotta bomb."
*WAIT NO-*
Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time it was sung... the line “fire away” caused massive confusion and shooting!
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!
When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.
When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.
When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.
When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.
What makes a nuke and divorce the same?
It only takes one of each to end your life.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}