Walk jokes

Kid: Where do I put this paper?

Teacher: I already said go ask your neighbors.

Kid: Ok. *Walks home to his neighbor's house*

Kid: Hey neighbor, I didn't know where to put this paper, and my teacher said to ask you. Do you know?

Neighbor: No, sorry, I don't.

Kid: Okay, bye! *Kid walks back to school.*

Kid: Teacher, my next-door neighbor didn't know.

Teacher: Ugh, you went home?!

Kid: Yes, you told me to!

Teacher: I meant at school!

Kid: Ohhhhhh!

Teacher: Duh!

I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.

That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.

An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.

I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.

What's white, black, and red all over?

A zebra who walked into a hunting reserve.

A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"

What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?

Let us prey.

POV: You walk up to your short friend and say, "How is the weather down there?"

When I walk to school, I fart.

A kid went to visit his bully, and he says, "How's your face?" The kid says, "How's your parents?" and proceeds to walk out of the orphanage.

Funny how "Hawking" rhymes with "talking" and "walking," and he can't do either.

And the first four letters of his Christian name spell "step," and he also can't do that.

They say Jesus walked on water.

That's nothing. Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.

So, little Johnny is walking down the street and asks a stranger, "Sir, what are hormones?"

Then the man replies, "The moans of a fucking whore!"

Julius Caesar walks into a bar and orders a Martinus.

The bartender asks, "Don't you mean Martini?"

Julius Caesar says, "No, I only want one."

I did a walk today, but I had a walk home from a walk. Walk today, but it when.

Two cunts were walking down the street.

One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."

My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"

I said, "Paper."

She said, "Really?"

I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"

So, every time I walk in the door, my kid shuts his laptop. So, I check his history. It was good, but my wife checked mine, and she didn't say the same. The words I heard were, "Get out!"

The past, present, and future walk into a bar.

It gets really tense.

I walked out of the electronic store and saw a midget carrying a big screen TV all by himself. He looked like he needed a hand, so I offered to help.

He said, "This is not a big screen TV, it's a Kindle!!"

A Roman walks into a bar and orders a martinus. The bartender says, "Don't you mean a Martini?" The Roman then says, "Look, if I want a double, I'll ask for one."

How do you get a Japanese fanclub?

Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!